20160226 (boys' toys)

A section of M. Leno's collection of over 300 automobiles and racing cars, each of which is kept in running condition by a team of restorers and mechanics. Sultan Hasbanahi Bolkiah has a collection of over 7,000 but he also has bathrooms in diamonds and gold, so what's a little wretched excess?

Who knows what drives collectors?

Whether it’s smooth stones from

The beach or vintage stereo systems

Their need outruns the “Bet you

Can’t eat just one,” hunger of

Potato chip fame. This variant of

Hoarding borrows something of

The joy of acquisition but adds

A bliss of having perhaps similar

To the happiness of having the

Only one, like Kim Jong Un’s

Pleasure in being married to the

Best looking woman in North

Korea, or the gloating that possessed

Holders of the Hope Diamond

Until they met their unfortunate

Ends. This is the society for

Acquiring. From radio commercials

To the advertisements that stare

Back at us above urinals in club

Restrooms, we are instructed, 

“To be happy you must have this.”

So, like the fools who see sky-written

Urges, “Drink Pepsi,” then search 

For the drink to quench a thirst

They didn’t know they had, an 

Idea is born, we actually think,

“Maybe. Maybe that’s what I need.”

I’d like to think if I had things to

Sell I wouldn’t jazz the pitch with

Appeals to inner hungers—“This

Old piano will bring your family

Hours of fun, playing and singing

Together like you did in the good

Old days.” Better than saying, 

“You’ll need to repair the backboard

And have it tuned.” Why entice when

The article itself should draw a proper 

Customer: “2002 Ford Focus ZX3, 

Loaded, yellow, slight body damage 

Otherwise well-maintained. 150K.” 

But if, “Your college friends will 

Envy you tooling around in this

Sporty gas sipper, “ gets me another 

Thousand or sells it a week sooner,

Who knows what I’d do? But

Getting back to the collector issue

I once saw the now ignominious

Bill Cosby defend his purchases

Of antique French furniture by

Saying,  “You can’t sit on it like

You could a chair from Penney’s,

But in a year, this will be worth

Much more and the Penney’s chair

Will be junk.” In my YouTube

Surfing I came across Jay Leno’s

Garage, a site that features displays

Of one of the three hundred or more

Vintage and racing automobiles Mr. 

Leno has garnered over the years

Of his comedic career. He defends

This excess to his wife saying “A

Guy could get into a lot of trouble

With money. But when I’m out of

Sight, you know I’m in the garage.”

It turns out that Leno is not the only

Wealthy person berserk in this mode.

You can see a listing of these car-

Addled in a link* offered below.

I confess I don’t know if these guys

Have secretively founded hospitals 

For the poor to match each of their auto

Trifles. Still, since you can drive

Only one at a time, and since for

Most of us, cars are often more

Pain than pleasure, their assemblage

Of these treasures mostly to sit

Unused seems more than a bit odd.

These have value only to other

Collectors—like Cosby’s French

Furniture. But they require care

Which provides a good living to

Many honest mechanics—so why

Should I complain?

c. J.S.Manista, 2016

*http://www.therichest.com/rich-list/the-biggest/the-10-biggest-car-collectors-in-the-world/?view=all