20161011 (circulation)

May never be read by the critics but at least they're read

When Barb Hansen complained

Some time ago that my writing

Without conventional punctuation

Was virtually unreadable by many

I agreed for the sake of boosting

Followership to give it a try. Time

To report: no remarkable improvement.

Likewise no appreciable increase

In comments, feedback, or street

Assaults. To claim these results

Have had no effect would be an

Outright dissemblance and I have

The wet hankies to prove it. As I 

Wrote earlier all is not lost. I could

Offer money or gifts to those who

Comment in writing, much like

Old radio shows would give a 

Free box of Preparation H to the

“Third caller,” in my case, any

Commenter. Or reproduce the

Essay which best cleans up

My phrasing, punctuation, diction, 

Spelling, humor, or topic.

Don’t hold your breath for

Monetary awards or even stale

Cheese as I am a notorious

Skinflint who is not likely to

Say “Thanks” to the EMS

Who restarts my heart. The 

Prospect of posthumous

Recognition of course is

Always a possibility unless

Blogger pulls the plug on

My site and my thumb drive

Gets lost forever in my gadget

Drawer. The trouble with

Posthumous recognition is

It’s rather like life insurance—

You don’t get to enjoy it.

So my tack henceforth

Shall be to comment openly

And unpredictably on friends, 

Family, old flames, others I’ve

Met since childhood, revealing

What I know of their secrets,

Fears, STDs, lovers, and the like

In the hope this august company

Will eagerly and daily scour 

My output for disclosures

Worthy of profitable suit.

Except I won’t name them

That would make it too easy

For the lawyers. It should

Create intense interest in

“Just who was he talking 

About when he mentioned

The woman who can’t eat 

Larger pickles,?” You know

That sort of scandalous stuff

That made Hedda Hopper,

Louella Parsons, Liz Smith,

And Perez Hilton household

Names and rich. See, that’s

The kind of crap that happens

When genius is denied its most

Deserved honor. Toodle-oo, then.

Keep an eye open over your

Shoulder, dear readers.

c. J.S.Manista, 2016